Something nasty down in Farmer Ted’s woodshed

Aug 5 2008 by Mike Chapple, Liverpool Daily Post

Farmaggedon at Farmer Ted's _320

DOWN on the farm, something wicked this way comes. Farmer Ted’s, in Flatman’s Lane, Downholland, is a working farm that doubles as a theme park for children who want to pet and stroke cute fluffy little animals.

But, in the run-up to Halloween, something far more sinister and truly horrible is stirring, strictly for adults only and certainly not for cuddling – not unless you want your head ripped off.

Giuseppe Savage, gatekeeper and curator to Farmaggedon, is currently converting two barns at the farm into venues destined to scare the living daylights out of the curious.

“People will be coming here to be badly frightened and I can assure them they will not be disappointed,” said Giuseppe, alias 43-year- old farmer Martin Edwards, who decided five years ago to diversify.

First, there was the butcher’s shop, then the animal Farm Park, and then the children’s Halloween week. It was then that he decided to get his teeth into something a bit gorier.

He teamed up with professional actor and fellow horror fan, 33-year-old Richard Cottier, to produce the first Farmaggedon last year which proved to be an unqualified success. Thousands flooded to the isolated farm in the nights leading up to Halloween to be terrified in a barn converted into a palace of fright.

This year’s Farmageddon will be even more ambitious and frightening, with two themed experiences or “haunts” to endure: Terror On The Farm and InsaniTy, which is set in an old, supposedly deserted, mental hospital.

The so-called haunts industry already attracts massive business in the US, where huge complexes have been transformed into interactive mausoleums of horror.

“We’re about 10 years behind the haunts in the States, and have got a lot of catching up to do,” explained Martin, dressed in a very convincing zombie get-up. “Everyone’s perception of horror is different – which is why this is such a growing industry.”

He and Richard have toured the States picking brains – not literally – and gleaning knowledge from those running infamous venues such as the House of Shock and The 13th Gate, horror shows both based in Louisiana.

“They were very helpful in giving away advice, probably because they realised that we weren’t a threat as we’re based over here,” said former Chesterfield High pupil Richard.

He will be auditioning for an army of so-called Must Scare Teers who will be marshalled into various roles trouncing the fields and buildings on the nights of Farmaggedon.

“Just leaving the Formby bypass and heading to the farm on a narrow unlit road is enough to put most people in the mood.

“And the adventure begins as soon as you park your car – I warn you, you won’t be left alone. That’s why we want plenty of volunteers – vampires, zombie nurses, soldiers. You name it, if it’s undead, we want to hear from them.”

* BUDDING Must Scare Teers are invited to email Freddie – sorry Richard – at darklord@farmaggedon.co.uk

mikechapple@dailypost.co.uk

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