AUSTRALIA: Things that go bump in the night

Dec 10 2007 Tim Ross

Tim Ross gets to grips with the wildlife of Australia’s outback

AS DARKNESS fell over the isolated cabin, the noises from the tall gum trees all around were deeply unsettling to the ears of a lone British tourist.

Unidentified screechings pierced the air and the warm spring night came alive with the hiss of insects. An army of toads bleated in the lake nearby.

It had rained all afternoon and the wildlife of Western Australia’s Merribrook Retreat was awakening to the world with a new and frightening joy.

To many first-time visitors, the single most alarming fact about Australia is the sheer nastiness of many of the creatures that have proved tough enough to so far survive the formidable climate here.

There’s the deadly Box Jellyfish, for example, with its three-metre tentacles. There are tiger snakes and the tiny Redback spider with its blood-coloured warning flash, saltwater crocodiles, brown snakes and deadly fast bowlers called McGrath.

Despite its playful name and idyllic setting, there is something unnerving, too, about Merribrook’s cluster of isolated chalets, situated in acres of untouched bush.

Once inside the smartly equipped cabin, the door firmly shut, it was a struggle not to think about the fact that there was no mobile phone reception, no TV, no telephone to the main lodge a hundred yards away, and no means of contacting the wider world beyond.

A good hot soak in the luxurious bathroom helped bring a sense of calm to the evening. And, after a long day’s travelling, the welcome comfort of bed brought the beginnings of sleep, once I began to zone out the disturbing chorus outside.

But then it happened. With a loud bang, some giant bear-like animal crashed onto the roof, rattling the thin window pane and letting out a howl of unspeakable violence in the darkness.

Kookaburras laughed murderously from the tree-tops outside and the beast started circling the hut. The animal thundered into the side of the chalet again and again, its heavy tread growing louder as it padded past the door just a few feet away.

How could the lightly-built cabin withstand such an onslaught? If the beast broke through the door, the only available weapons seemed to be a sachet of coffee and a teaspoon.

Immobilised by fear, I did what many before must have done and hid under the bedclothes waiting for dawn or death.

The next day, a glorious sunny morning broke over Merribrook and there were thankfully no signs of monsters in the beautiful gardens outside.

Happily, the hospitable owners prepare one of the finest breakfasts in the land for hungry guests.

Merribrook, along with with the rest of this beautiful part of Western Australia, enjoys some inspiring scenery. Driving through the Margaret River region brings to mind the gentle vine-covered hills of Burgundy, but with a distinctive Australian edge.

Vivid green vines form neat rows across the hillsides, while in the next field blackened tree stumps jut up from the parched earth.

A tree-lined route takes visitors past dozens of wineries, all displaying an invitation to sample their wares at the “cellar door”.

The culture of fine food is also familiar. If Burgundy is known as “the belly of France”, Margaret River must surely be the paunch (finely rounded and tanned by the midday sun) of Australia.

Four hours’ drive from Perth, this short stretch of surfer’s coast has become perhaps the New World’s most celebrated wine region.

It now rivals some of the finer labels of Europe for sheer quality, with big name wineries exporting to the UK including Cullen, Cape Mentelle and Vasse Felix.

At the Grove Vineyard, one of the smaller estates, you can even learn how to make your own sparkling wine.

Australia has developed an image as the unrivalled producer of barbecue bargains, but most of the wines of Margaret River are pitched at the classier end of the market.

Perth, WA’s thriving cultural capital, is substantially easier to reach from the UK than many more popular destinations such as Sydney, several hours’ flight farther away on the eastern coast.

The city is a bustling urban centre with its own excellent restaurants, stylish hotels, museums and galleries.

The straightforward drive south from Perth to Margaret River passes good beaches for surfing while the seaside town of Rockingham offers wildlife lovers a swim with the local in- shore dolphins.

The town of Busselton, en route, was recommended for its “famous” long jetty. Pulling into the car park, the attraction became obvious. The jetty really is, well, very long.

But there’s also an underwater observatory, which affords mesmerising views of the seabed and hundreds of colourful varieties of fish and other marine life.

Once in the laid-back surfer’s town of Margaret River itself, though, one of the most memorable trips out is a Bushtucker Tour.

Small groups can spend a few hours canoeing up the Margaret River and hiking through the woods with the help of an expert guide. After working up an appetite and learning about the area’s aboriginal heritage, visitors sit down to a lunch of kangaroo meat and a variety of assorted edible nuts and plants. Wichetty grubs in thousand island sauce are also available, if you are so inclined.

When we embarked on the Bush- tucker Tour, I was still weary from a somewhat disturbed night’s sleep at Merribrook. Eating lunch in the open air amid the exuberant buzzing and squawking of nature did renew my respect for Australia’s remarkable – and sometimes frightening – wildlife.

But, most of all, chewing on a slice of smoked ‘roo was just a great way to get even with the beast that went bump in the night.

TIM ROSS was a guest of Tourism Australia and flew with Qantas, which offers return flights to Perth in 2008 from £833 (fare £528 and GB taxes £305). Fare applies for travel between April 16 and June 15, 2008. Qantas Holidays reservations: 020 8222 9101 or www.qantas.co.uk Among operators with packages to Margaret River, Bridge & Wickers offers 14-night independent self- drive visits to the region from £1,743, including return Qantas flights into Perth, four nights in Perth at The Duxton, followed by 11 nights in Margaret River at Quay West Bunker Bay, and 14 days’ car hire. Accommodation in both places on room-only terms. Bridge & Wickers reservations: 0207 483 6555 or www.bridgeandwickers.co.uk

EXPERIENCE the land down under with the Australia: the Great Ocean Road  13-day trip. Priced from £1,799, it includes return flights from Manchester  via London, 10 nights’ hotel accommodation, visits to Sydney, Melbourne,  Adelaide, Otway and Coorange National Park, Tower Hill State Game  Reserve and the Coonawarra wine region, a scenic drive along Victoria's  Great Ocean Road.
Various departures, April, 2008-April, 2009, fully escorted by a  Travelscope Tour Manager. For further details, contact Daily Post Travel  Service on tel: 0151 227 5987.