THE tooth fairy is having a personality crisis. Somewhere between collecting a seven-year-old’s incisor and dropping it back at base, she has developed a severe case of meanness.

Experts – yes, indeed, there is a team of white-coated boffins even for this – are attributing it to the credit crunch, an expression that could have been invented by economists just to give us something other than them to blame.

Before the stock markets, employment figures and general bonhomie took a nose- dive, what did we used to say was the cause of all our problems?

Or was the world we were living in truly the halcyon Utopia of three-car families, five-star holidays and affordable organic fruit and veg we keep hearing about?

Clearly, judging by the demand for column inches dedicated to our reduced disposable income, many of us had forgotten how good we had it, which just shows you have to learn to appreciate the little things in life like Sunday afternoons in the garden, crumbly Lancashire cheese and tooth fairies.

You think you’ve got it hard? Try squeezing through a keyhole and diving under a giant pillow, while avoiding being smothered by a Goliath-child, then beating a hasty retreat with a sharp pointy thing five times your body weight in both arms.

Then, of course, there are slavering pets to deal with, and the risk of copper poisoning from all the coins you have to carry.

Despite the perks of the job (keeping fit, outdoor working, flexi-time), it’s a wonder the tooth fairy didn’t contract a case of the galloping Scroogitis much earlier.

Now she’s being criticised for cutting back her remunerations by up to 10% – reducing her annual outgoings by some £2m.

While this may disappoint children hoping to swap their pearly whites for a Wii Fit, at least it will deter parents from feeding their kids a diet of pick ’n’ mix in an effort to supplement the family income.

Just wait until the tooth fairy realises she could be charging for her services, maybe take a cut of council taxes like the waste disposal people, and Alistair Darling would have an even bigger problem on his hands.