BRITAIN’S Got Talent has been and gone. Big Brother 10 looks to be the most boring yet and Mrs Beckham is keeping a low profile since being papped leaving the gym looking less than perfect.

On the serious news side the MPs’ expenses scandal – at least as far as moats and floating duckhouses is concerned – seems to have peaked and there are only so many pictures of Gordon Brown turning his face inside out you can print.

Pity those poor guys on Fleet Street. What will they fill their pages with now?

Fear not, because where one Simon Cowell showcase leaves off another picks up.

Yes, filming has begun for X Factor.

And while it will be some time before we get our chance to point and laugh at the oddbods who, for some reason believe they can be the next Beyonce, it gives the press all summer to stoke the fire that is Cheryl vs Dannii.

We had round one last year when Mrs Cole and Ms Minogue were first pitted against each and round two looks set to be even bloodier.

Even before filming started there were stories claiming Cheryl had splashed out over £30,000 on some sort of home vacuum machine to “suck” the (non-existent) fat from her bum and thighs lest she appear bigger than Dannii on television.

Given that the pint-sized Geordie has just completed a gruelling nationwide tour with Girls Aloud and it’s a safe bet you could bounce five-pence pieces off her tight tum, I find that hard to believe.

Then there’s the fact that last year’s endless tales of backstage bickering, were consistently denied by both women.

But, hey, why let the facts get in the way of a good catfight?