It’s a bling thing

Nov 11 2008 by Mr Brocklebank, Liverpool Daily Post

MTV stars got a real eyeful at the channel’s annual awards in Liverpool. Not to be outdone by the gangsta rappers and popster blingers, our man with the hippest hoppest appeal, Lord Mayor Steve Rotheram, blinded all-comers with the biggest bling in the city – his priceless golden mayoral chain. As one shocked rapper spluttered in Mr Brocklebank’s shell-like: “My God, he’s out blinged the blingers. Puff Daddy’s got nothing on him!” So, rock on, Cllr Steve “Chain Gang” Rotheram.

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IT must be funny – I heard it from an (out of touch and slightly deaf) Scouser: Incredulous fan at MTV Awards: “Look! That’s Kanye West!” OTSD Scouser: “Oo’s Kenny West?”

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AT least our man saw the stars, in contrast Radio 1’s team were so disorientated trying to find the Echo Arena that they lost their red carpet interview spot.

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FANCY THAT (1): At Liverpool Council’s executive board meeting after MTV’s event, leader Cllr Warren Bradley was still so intoxicated with warmth towards presenter Katy Perry that he opened proceedings trilling her controversial hit, I Kissed A Girl. A young press gallery scallywag heckled: “Did you like it, Warren”? Cllr Bradley later admitted feeling “fuzzy”. What can he mean?

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FANCY THAT (2): Mr Brocklebank’s trusty old housekeeper Mrs Merkin hyper-ventilated on reading that Liverpool One will be featured on ITV3. But imagine her disappointment, as she fingered her fantastic plastic, to find this was not a shopping channel dedicated to Britain’s classiest new shopping centre, but re-runs of the 1990s cop series about a city of vice, drugs, gangsters and brothels. That’s more like it.

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THE giant Royal Liver Building clock chimed a couple of minutes ahead of the two minutes silence at 11am on Sunday for Liverpool’s Remembrance Day on the Plateau. Will this be adjusted for today’s 11th hour of the 11th day, or are we sticking to LMT – Liverwich Mean Time?

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MERSEYTRAVEL top banana Neil Scales grabbed his old apprentice’s spanner for a directors’ “back to the floor” scheme, helping to service Mersey Ferries’ m/v Snowdrop. Can he not use his handy tools to cut down the barbed wire around the Cruise Liner Terminal’s gangways and transform our own “Guantanamo Bay” back into Liverpool Bay?

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TRULY honest Liverpool University archivists cataloguing the Mersey Poets’ work found £450 of old bank notes in an envelope addressed to Roger McGough and forwarded it to him, reports the poet. Adding that fellow Mersey versifier Brian Patten immediately claimed it was his, saying archivists later found an IOU for him from McGough.